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Week 5: Patriots vs. Texans

Houston... we have a problem

Week 4 and the over-hyped Brady homecoming is over. It's Week 5 and we're playing (arguably) the easiest game of the season. Or, are we? Our OL is in shambles. Our OL has been in shambles since the beginning of the season (or maybe the end of last), but now we're looking at protecting QB1 with a bunch of castaways. I imagine if you have Damien Harris on your fantasy team you're playing him because I have a feeling we're going to be doing the ol' Ground and Punt game. Thankfully, I have a lot of faith in our defense and think they'll be the biggest reason we win, today. Our secondary is a little banged up, but there's no way this rookie QB pulls out a win against BB, right?

This could be an absolute sh*t show.

Pats win 24-10

Bold Prediction: Damien Harris has a rushing and receiving TD

Thoughts from the board


All depends on if the OL is active and/or healthy. I could see another game with 40-plus attempts for Mac.

Bold Prediction: I promised a riot if Meyers didn't get a TD last week, and one Pearls Before Swine panel does not a riot make. I'll predict the Meyers TD again and again until he finally gets one.


All about the OL. If they play a bunch of subs, Texans may win this.

Bold Prediction: BB puts in Hoyer before Jones is destroyed.


The defense is good in this game. Hopefully, the Patriots can find 5 offensive lineman.

Bold Prediction: The Patriots have two 9 minute drives that yeld 3 points each.


Oline will play well despite being decimated by injuries (and just being bad anyway).

Bold Prediction: Stevenson gets a tuddy


O-line is of course the big question mark, but I think the defense will shut down Davis Mills. Will be interesting to see how quickly Collins is integrated into the mix and whether he makes any plays right off the bat. Also, now that JC is 'the guy' in the secondary, do we see a big game from him or does he feel the pressure?

Bold Prediction: Brandon Bolden scores a TD on a toss sweep and everybody loses their minds.


Two of the worst offensive lines in football nearly get their rookie QBs killed.

Bold Prediction: Patriots will run for single digit yards.


Lots of running. But not lots of yards running.

Bold Prediction: Bolden with two, count 'em, two TDs. I also predict a DNOM riot.


Run run run, punt. I'm fine with it. let the defense score for the offense in this game.


I'm just glad Deshaun Watson isn't playing. That dude made me wanna steal Jim's Tums (oh, yeah....offensive line. Had to mention it. All the cool kids are doing it).

Bold Prediction: I got nothin'. This is gonna be kind of a snoozefest.

Score Predictions

  • Zoo - Pats win 24-10

  • DNOM - Pats win 23-14

  • OG MAC - Pats win 20-17

  • dp73 - Pats win 19-9

  • Blight - Pats win 31-13

  • RKing - Pats win 24-10

  • Dino - Pats win 9-6

  • Bones - Pats win 21-17

  • AdAstra - Pats win 13-3

  • Oscar - Texans win 17-6

Oscar is the lone wolf ahhhhoooooooooooooooo!

Jarod Taylor Photo
Jarod Taylor
Memorable Sports Moments
Kevin Walker's tackle on Bo Jackson (childhood hero), ultimately ending his career, Steve Atwater's hit on Christian Okoye, Super Bowl XXXVI, The anger I felt when the Pats lost Super Bowl XLII, Malcolm Butler's interception against the Seahawks, The Pats comeback win in Super Bowl LI